Yesterday I was reading Grace Upon Grace by John W. Kleinig. This passage brought tears to my eyes because it is so familiar.
"As a Christian, I know that I shouldn't harbor doubts about God's goodness, nor should I feel hostile toward the people around me. But I do. And I don't receive much help from the Church in dealing with the fact that I do. Where can I turn when I feel that God has betrayed and abandoned me? How can I get rid of my bitterness, anger, rage, and even hatred toward those people who have humiliated and hurt me? What can I do with the guilt and shame I feel about my failure to be the kind of person I should be? What hope is there for me if I am overcome by depression and threatened with a nervous breakdown? People seem to think that such experiences and feelings are out of place in the life of a Christian. The pity of it is that by this very stratagem of denial we miss out on the best opportunities for spiritual growth. The person who avoids his own troubles may, in fact, avoid God." (p. 186-187)