A few days ago I was completely wasted. I could not make myself get out of bed. I knew that lying in bed does not make depression go away but felt overpowered by vague and persistent feelings of wanting to surrender. At times like that, how I feel and what I know are completely unrelated. I feel like nothing good exists for me, but know that there is lots of good in my life.
I could not think what to do except hope that the next morning I would feel better. Blessedly, I did.
Days like that remind me why the relationship between the psychological and the spiritual is so hard to define. Days like that feel like Satan is working overtime, like I might never again be in the light.
If someone asked me why I go to church I might say it's because of days like that. I need to practice knowing that Jesus is with me, that God's promises are reliable, so I can see them in the dark.